"I am such a loser." "I didn't get a single thing done today." "I ate like garbage." "I'm a failure." Do you have the same narrative playing in your head? Do you need mental icepacks from the bruises you got from beating yourself up? Are you tired of that story? "If it bleeds, it leads," may be great for the news, but not very healthy for your life. We all make mistakes, but are they the end of the world? Are you only your mistakes? This so-called "loser" managed to bake a sourdough loaf, four apple crisps, create a masterpiece, and draft a PowerPoint and, the day is far from over. When I get out of my own way, there is no limit to what I can accomplish.
If you are still writing yourself as a bit player in your story, you will never defeat the dragon, climb the mountain, or "insert valiant quest here." I frequently have to challenge the stories I tell myself. A simple exercise is to ask, "Is that true?" I am stretching myself and applying for something that I am passionate about doing. Stacy, the bit player, would decide that she should not go for the leading role since she does not have the entire play memorized. Stacy, the new darling of the acting scene, reviewed all of her parts and experience and realized that she deserves a shot. If you do not try because you are afraid to fail, you have already failed.
Opportunity is easier to find if you are open to success. All of your prior experiences help to prepare you for new things. Every success, every misstep, is a learning opportunity. Nothing is stopping you from another take. Try the scene again. What if you used a different inflection? What if you played the character against type? Are you able to improvise if another player forgets their line or a stage prop does not work? Trust in your abilities. Will, you forever practice, or will you be brave and step on that stage in the vulnerable limelight?
The audience holds its breath as a new player steps onto the stage. They are completely naked! You wake up; that was your nightmare. You step on the scene, fully clothed, and do your best. When you are the author, the audience has no idea what is supposed to happen. Remember that when you start judging your performance. Perfect characters fail to hold our interest. We like the flawed characters, and we root for them to win. Are you ready to be the underdog instead of the understudy? Do you want to be a bit player your entire life? Don't get me wrong; it takes a team to put on a production, but the creator always takes a bow. If I can help you write a new role for yourself, please do not hesitate to reach out. Namaste.